The Hindu Business Line : No budgeting for tastes

A COLLEAGUE claims that he spent all of last year hurtling down the staircase under the influence of drugs administered by a well-meaning physician to de-sensitise his mind, and it seems as if this year he might be spending time struggling to maintain his position on a tread-mill going down, trying to remain where he is. This time under the influence of another physician who seems bent on overdosing him with drugs intended to help (or if necessary force) him recoup the 20-kg or so he lost last year. Preferably in six weeks.

In vain, he says, he has appealed to the better instincts of the doctor, making the point that for him to gain so much weight (or, more precisely so much fat, for the new doctor does not much care where he puts it on) is probably worse even than losing it. For then, at least it first got trimmed off certain predictable parts of the body. Then, he had some control over the direction he went down in.

Climbing up to the top, now, willy-nilly, whether he likes it or not, there seems to be only one goal in sight. Our colleague expresses his gratitude to the Almighty, however, because these ups and downs are taking place now instead of a decade ago. For then, by and large it was a slower process, each up and down taking on an average 12 to 18 months to work. Now the changes seem to be getting compressed into shorter, 3 to 6 month, time horizons.

So what's so good about that? Well, trousers now last longer. So at least he finds himself saving on his tailor. When the old trousers no longer fit, he simply pulls out the ones that are older still; claims he has acquired too much good sense on the way to throw things out once they are no longer of any use. He picked up the idea from the businessman's dictum: Don't ever slam a door, you might want to go back. If so, it's the only bit of sense he's acquired over the year. At least, we haven't noticed him gaining anything else lately. Except weight. We have only his word for the rest.

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