The Hindu Business Line : On mauled markets and chutneyed charts

SOME said 249 and others shrieked 219. And many were asking which one was the score of the batting side, and which, the beating that the Sensex took. By afternoon, even the late-to-wake-up knew that we had tumbled not only in Kanpur but also in Mumbai. Trading terminals are silent during the weekend, but there are noisy mails in the inbox!

Kya hua, re?

Here are the facts: "Sensex lost 219.58 points to erode 3.39 per cent of its value, and closed at 6248.34." The drama is that the drop was the biggest since May 28, 2004, when the index shed 223.16 points.

Kyon, why, yaen, perchè, porqué, waarom, warum ... ?

I know, you're asking `why' in Hindi, English, Tamil, Italian, Spanish, Dutch and German. First reason is the fall or meltdown of international indices on Vishu, Paarthiba, Baisakhi, or our New Year, when our markets were closed on Thursday; so, we fell on Friday, to show our solidarity. Second, Infy told us a bleak story about next quarter that its earnings will be `flat,' so tech stocks fell flat. There were more reasons, such as metal stocks rattling, and fears of economic slowdown in China and the US. But philosophers say simply, karma.

Kahan?

Thank you for not asking this question after my kahani is over! Let me begin from 1875 when 318 persons became members of what is today called `The Stock Exchange, Mumbai', paying a princely sum of Re 1, as the BSE site narrates. But the damage is not restricted to a particular geography as in the case of natural calamities. When the index shivers, the shocks traverse the economic system and impact the investment decisions of millions who may be far removed from the country's financial nerve centre.

Kab?

Since I'm sure you know we're talking about the frying that happened on Friday, I guess you'd like to know when the index would improve. It's like cricket they say, anything can happen. After gasping at the magnitude of the decline, traders have become so edgy that they're already experiencing Monday blues.

Kaise?

In matters of paise and rupees, `how' is easy to explain with a graph that is drawn southward. Since news reports are supposed to tell you `how,' these headlines may help: `Stocks tumble across the board,' `Markets mauled in Friday frenzy,' `Is the tech party over?' `IT leads plunge in sectoral indices,' `Sensex tanks 220 pts on Infy guidance,' `Black Friday for markets,' `Rs 50,000 crore sink with Sensex!' and `Bloodbath in Dalal St.' And my cook has some spicy suggestions: `Chutneyed charts' and `Grated graphs.'

Kaun, who, yaar ... ?

Before you finish with all the languages of the world, let me assure you that the FM's warning has come true! Do you remember that Chiddu came to Mumbai about a week ago and gave stern warnings? He told the broking industry to prepare for the next generation of reforms by corporatising. "There is no place for lone rangers," he said, and if you don't understand the meaning, you're not alone. Then he showed them Spiderman comics and chided, "Nahin, nahin."

End of all K-queries, I suppose. This day, however, belongs to a different set of Ks, viz. Kotla and Kashmir. So watch the scoreboard, tomorrow is a different day!

SayCheek@TheHindu.co.in

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On mauled markets and chutneyed charts