The Hindu Business Line : Straight from the horse's mouth

THE story of `worst kind of horse-trading' has made its way right from the PMO to the neighbourhood stable, after having been flashed to Russia and returned with lots of love. They say it was Buta who first smelt the thing about horses and alerted Manny who had gone to see the big cats.

It seems, even as Kalam was talking to Putin about a just world order, some legislators were getting pushed out of Bihar border, at gunpoint! So, let's take some shot at the topic on hand, as long as the ammo lasts.

What is horse-trading?

It is the swapping of horses, accompanied by much bargaining, explains www.cogsci.princeton.edu. Another meaning is negotiation accompanied by mutual concessions and shrewd bargaining.

But the phrase has a special meaning for us; it refers to the stratagem of luring MLAs or MPs from other parties, to cobble up numbers and thus make up the majority to form a government.

Which was `worst' - horse or trading?

I guess horses were good enough, but the trading methods weren't. Our PM was aghast that some of the legislators were even bribed!

To make life tough for the horses, rivals were pulling the creatures hither and thither. Villains didn't know that you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink! And they neighed hard and long, which was heard loud and clear in the Raj Bhavan.

Any evidence?

The Governor has declared he has evidence of horse-trading; perhaps, he heard it straight from the horse's mouth. Unconfirmed sources say that all the hoof marks were heading to Jharkhand. And, that, there was the unmistakable dropping of hint by the agitated animals to lead the forensic experts by the scent in their mission of protecting democracy.

How does one go, buy a horse?

First, find out "owner's name, phone number and asking price for the horse," as advised by www.allabouthorses.com.

Older horses are called `dead broke' because they are half dead, so look at age. An important question to answer is, "How many people previously owned this horse?"

I know a rhyme on horse!

Perhaps this Mother Goose one, weirdly adapted: "For want of a nail, the shoe was lost; For want of the shoe, the horse was lost; For want of the horse, the majority was lost; For want of the majority, the sarkar was lost."

And that's what people seem to want the most!

Politicians have horse sense, don't they?

Horse sense is being sensible, logical, which I doubt if our netas are. They like horseplay, meaning just having fun, and they tell us horse feathers, that is, lies and false stories.

To get them develop the country is a horse of a different colour — a different matter, a separate issue.

Another election may be no different from beating a dead horse; for, we'll be continuing to try when there is no hope.

But they're changing horses midstream!

New alliances are forged, hoping to beat the possibility of a fractured mandate.

Because, to talk of friends after polls is to put the cart before the horse. There's no guarantee, however, that the winner won't be a dark horse.

SayCheek@TheHindu.co.in

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