The Hindu Business Line : PC worship

DO not get it wrong: I do not mean Mr P. Chidambaram, though he too is coming close to being worshipped for the goodies in his Budgets. I mean personal computers which have already acquired a divine status, as the God of Gods, capable of showering boons and blessings far exceeding those within the ken of day-to-day deities.

How do you spot an ardent PC devotee? Here is how: Once he acquires a PC, he installs it, along with its consort, the monitor, with tender care, as reverentially and as ceremoniously as he would the idols or pictures of gods and goddesses in his puja room.

The PC, unlike the deities, must be assured of well-ventilated, cool, airy, dust-free surroundings, if not a regular air-conditioned ambience, with enough space for all the attendant accoutrements: The mouse, the modem, the speakers, the printer, the web camera, the DVD player, the works.

The moment he gets up in the morning, the PC worshipper rushes to the sanctum sanctorum to pay respectful obeisance by "booting" it. The tiny lights of different colours blinking all over the PC and its consort, make him feel a glow as when he is in a temple when lamps light up all round him. He is punctilious in not deviating a bit from the regular order to be observed if the worship is to proceed along sanctified lines.

First, the e-mail boxes. The use of plural is deliberate, for a real good devotee will have as many as there are servers willing to provide them. If you watch his countenance, you will see an aurora borealis of emotions playing on it: now it will brighten, now the brows will knit, now shadows will pass over it, now the lips will be pressed.

There are very subtle rituals governing what to delete, what to keep, what to reply, what to forward, what to ignore, what to download, and what to upload.

Next is the time of meditation over Web sites which may have been previously customised or opened as a link or at random. The duration of this period of silent, intent concentration is indeterminate, often counted in hours. This is the true yoga state: He is oblivious to anything happening round him; you can perform a major operation on him. The mind, purged of all worldly desires and mortal impurities, merges with the Supreme Brahman (the PC), in a spirit of utter serenity and tranquillity. Om shantih, shantih, shantihi!

B. S. Raghavan