The Hindu Business Line : Earn, and yearn, for each other!

Put some financial good sense into your marriage along with romance and pep. Here are some guidelines for couples to thrash out money matters before they walk down the aisle.

Srividhya Sivakumar

Have you ever wondered what happened to those couples from the fairy tales after their happily ever-afters? Well, they must have lived happily ever after. For, unlike us lesser mortals, those couples (read princes and princesses) would not have had to grapple with the nuances of managing household finances.

Agreed, managing expenses and paying bills would probably be the last thing on your mind before the wedding, but let’s face it — these are important aspects of your happily-ever-afters. You could be better off getting an understanding of your partner’s financial objectives and commitments and check if they are in sync with yours. Here are a few important aspects worth considering before you decide to walk down the aisle.

Be upfront

It may be easier said than done — but knowing each other’s financial commitments could be as crucial as any of the other factors that usually figure in most pre-wedding checklists. Being candid with each other about any debts, education loan or sometimes even home loans that either of you has taken (for yourself or for relatives) is important since they can influence your future spending decisions.

Also, sharing views on financial commitments towards both your families is equally essential, more so when you are the sole breadwinner. Agreed, broaching these topics could be a little difficult, especially when you need such declarations from your partner, but remember you are better off discussing these aspects of your lives than having to tackle them post-wedding.

Discuss financial objectives

Marriages might be made in heaven, but remember you live through them on earth.

Acknowledge the fact that money can assume a greater role in post-wedding life, thus highlighting the importance of discussing each other’s financial objectives.

Being upfront about each other’s financial goals is a must, especially when both of you are economically independent.

Say your near-term objective is to buy a car, but your partner rates buying a house as more important — while such a difference will certainly not swing your marriage decision the other way, discussing it and coming to terms with each other’s financial goals before marriage can do a lot of good. In these days of ‘dink’ couples (double income no kids), differences in financial goals can also add to the post-wedding blues.

Know each other’s risk appetite

Discussions on each other’s financial obligations and risk appetite before the wedding can be considered a taboo, but it is imperative that you do. While it is not being suggested that you swap your romantic Tête-À-Têtes with a cold analysis of financial risk appetites, make sure that these topics do find their way into your pre-marital agenda of things-to-do.

Knowing and sharing each other’s ideas on investments and risk tolerance is a must since disagreements over such aspects could dominate your conversations over breakfast.

Your comfort with your partner’s investment risk is very important.

Get an idea about each other’s spending behaviour

Imagine working day-in and day-out just to find out that your better half has spent double your salary on shopping! Marrying a ‘shopoholic’ could be anyone’s nightmare. Alternately, marrying someone who believes in almost zilch spending can also be challenging.

While we are not suggesting that shopoholics or frugal types should not be married, make sure you get at least some inkling about what your would-be’s spending inclinations are.

Remember that such divergent spending patterns can also weigh on your combined spending capacities.

Stark differences in spending behaviours can make life difficult; take care to find out if the two of you can develop tolerance towards each other’s urges to splurge — or otherwise.

Discuss and plan your transition from yearning for each other to also earning for each other.

Being financially yours

‘Dink’ couples can also use such discussions to iron out the nitty gritty of ‘your money’, ‘my money’ and ‘our money’ issues.

While reaching and realising marital bliss does not depend only on the riches you amass over your lifetime, understand that it does exert much influence. Make a common investing game plan and allocate roles; this will not only help you share each other’s goal, but also help secure your happily-ever-afters financially.

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