The Hindu Business Line : Remembering Chandra

Beginning of a dawn and the sun was playing hide and seek. The scene was the Elliot's Beach in Chennai. The sea was calm, allowing a soothing music on tape to float by — `Suryamurthe Namostuthe' — a Muthuswamy Dikshitar kriti sung by B. Krisna Murthy. On the sand silhouetted against the sky was Chandralekha paying homage to Lord Surya. Visually so beautiful and the music so divine. What a mesmerising moment!

This was a long number of years ago but the scene and the energy that poured remains etched in my memory.

I pull out the picture of Chandra I took that day, but this is another day. Chandra is no more. It is now all a disquieting nostalgia. Few years ago I parted company of the sand and the sea and today it is Chandra. I take comfort from what Sadanand says: "Her life circles are not linear but circular."

Circle... In a lot of ways Chandra is with us asking about the truth, its structure in the given space and the time factor.

Remember Ernst Haas, the famous photographer, defining truth? I rush and pull out his book. Here is what he says: "If truth is what we believe to be true, then every period, every culture has created its own truth, which has always been rooted in man's concept of the reason for existence. But in situations such as pain, love or joy or quest, one reaches from the narrow fact of truth into broader dimensions of poetry to express better all that one sees, feels and believes."

Dance gave Chandra a platform to question, argue the truth as defined by a tradition-bound society. She looked around, stood up and asked questions much to the discomfort of the orthodoxy. To her the dance meant more than religion and the cult of bhakthi. Truth of the form had a different dimension to her. Discover the body, linger around space and time and fill yourself with energy... this was Chandra's everlasting definition of truth. And through the dance medium her belief and expression found space. A change is needed, she told the tradition bound. Dance could, should move with the times. It has to rediscover itself, she said. Her dance, choreography, was an extension of her thought process.

It is strange that Chandra is referred to as a rebel by some people. I don't agree; it is just that Chandra had the courage to ask questions about values. She was brave to show that many an art form could combine to give Bharatanatya a new structure... a new balance. It was not as though she was against this great art form. Her effort was more a poetic endeavour. She had great respect for Rukmini Devi and Balasaraswati. I happened to be there when Chandra with a few youngsters showed her new innovations to Rukmini Devi at Kalakshetra in Chennai. It was a great sight to see Rukmini Devi putting her arms around Chandra and blessing her.

Chandralekha just looked at society and said: `This is me'.

It sounds like yesterday. But it was a long time ago. Living close to Chandra in Besant Nagar I would often run to her place. With Sadanand there and often Dashrath joining us there was so much to talk and learn from Chandra. Listened to her poetry, listened to her concept of Mandala — the Circle. She was a great visual person and my camera learnt so much during those interactive sessions. And Chandra, as my memory goes, is the only one who called me by my first name. Happy days. Troubled days. A group of us were always in her home.

When I had my first Exhibition of photographs in 1979 at the Max Mueller I was a bit nervous. And there was Chandra cheering me up. She made a lovely poster for me and I happily put it up in front of the Exhibition hall.

One day, around 1980, I walked into her home. I was talking about a picture I had taken that morning and was in a great mood. It caught on and that evening there was so much laughter and cheer. And suddenly Chandra turned to me and asked, "How is your new home in Injambakkam coming up?"

I laughed and said "No money... no work".

Next morning, around 4 a.m., there was a knock on our door. Who could it be?

I opened the door and was surprised to see Dashrath Patel. He gave me an envelope and said, "Chandra sent it to you. We are catching a morning flight. Bye."

He was gone even before I had opened the cover. There, inside, was a note from Chandra: "Raghavendra, work on home should not stop". Enclosed was a cheque for Rs 5,000.

She was so happy when we moved to our new home `Rasa' in Injambakkam... In many ways her home too.

Odd! I also made her very angry soon after Angika happened. I was at her home when the concept of Angika was born. Listening to her I had mentally visualised the way Angika would flow. Unusually, I came home without meeting Chandra. I felt that either the day or the artists had let Chandra's dream falter a bit. I should have called and talked to Chandra.

A day goes by and Chandra is on the phone.

"Why didn't you meet me? Why didn't you call? How was Angika?"

"Chandra... I guess we faltered a bit... ," I said.

That was that; she ended the call. She was very angry and for a long time a silence ensued. So close but suddenly a distance. Felt miserable but I did not know how to face Chandra.

When my series `The Sea' was on show, I wondered if Chandra would come. I so much wanted her to be there. And there she was with a big smile. Ran and gave me that soothing hug. My pictures suddenly had a better lustre. That was Chandra. Warm and friendly.

A tribute to Chandra. But how does one talk of a friend, a guide? The only way I could put pen on paper was by calling Sadanand in Chennai. Dashrath was there too. Glad I did it for they made me feel I belong to the family.

A word with Chandra... I'm sure she is listening... "Tell me more about Mandala. I need my life not to be but circular."

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