The Hindu Business Line : It pays to strike a balance

Unlike in the past, today, women are in leadership positions, managing people at work, managing meetings, deadlines, targets and so on. And then, at home, they could be managing electricity bills, children, buying groceries, attending parent-teacher meetings and so on. Only after meeting all these commitments do they even begin to consider their own quality of life.

My organisation recently conducted a series of training workshops on work-life balance for women employees of two leading companies in the automobile and real estate sectors. During the course of the workshops, many participants said while they felt they were doing justice to their roles as wives, mothers, executives and managers, their individual identities were lost somewhere in the grind. As a result, they often had no time to do what they wanted to as family, social and work responsibilities all encroached on their time. Some of the concerns expressed by the women attending these workshops were:

Problems in getting a full-time maid for the house

In-laws who lived in the same house and were not willing to let their grandchild go to a crèche, but were unable to take care of the child on account of their own indifferent health

Single parent, responsible for raising a teenage child

Guilt at not spending quality time with their husbands and in-laws and the concept of the nuclear family, which has its pros and cons

Some even wondered if expressing one's feelings and concerns was a reason for imbalance or was it best to ignore the situation or, maybe, giving things time to sort themselves out was the best solution. Here's what our training consultants shared with the women in the workshops on striking a balance between the various demands on their time and energy.

Talk it out and share concerns

Don't be a lone ranger in your effort to achieve a work-life balance. Ask for support, whether from family, friends, colleagues or your boss. Sometimes, even discussing one's concerns can solve a lot of problems. Always be open to accepting and learning from inspirational sources. Giving expression to your thoughts and concerns always helps. This also improves the quality of your relationships and improves your efficiency at work. And don't be scared of seeking help from a specialist.

Respect your personal space

Be strict in maintaining space between work and private life. There is a huge grey area, and if you let it grow, your life becomes more and more demanding and challenging. Share and treat responsibilities at home with the same urgency and importance like you do for the projects at work. Most women tend to postpone simple responsibilities like spending time with their husband, in-laws and children. Don't act out of guilt, but start respecting your personal life. Give quality time to yourself. It is important to introspect and be in sync with your well-being, and keep evolving as an individual at all times. And do not compromise on the quality of your life and relationships.

Imbalance and your health

Imbalance can have various sources and causes. It could be long working hours, lack of support, unclear demands, lack of growth opportunities at work, lack of motivation and recognition and so on. If you are not able to control and deal with these causes, they can start affecting your health and the most common among these health concerns could be:

Cervical, back/upper body muscular-skeletal aches

Indigestion, stomach problems, stress, hypertension, depression

Behavioural problems such as anger, irritation, mood swings and so on

Gynaecological problems.

So the next time you feel that you are showing signs of any of these, it could be a clear indication for you to change your lifestyle and start getting a work-life balance before it is too late.

Give yourself an exercise boost; lots of motivation from family, friends, books; get enough sleep; and keep yourself fit and healthy.

Enjoyment and achievement

At the core of an effective work-life balance are two key everyday concepts that are relevant to each of us. These are daily achievement and enjoyment, ideas almost deceptive in their simplicity. In the context of work-life balance, enjoyment stands for pride, satisfaction, happiness, celebration, love and a sense of well-being and all the other simple joys of living, which will lead to a chain of joys and will stream into happiness.

The next time you feel that you are facing an imbalance, ask yourself when was the last time you achieved and enjoyed something at work? What about achieving and enjoying with your family and your friends? And how recently have you achieved and enjoyed something just for yourself? Surprise your family; take them out on a picnic or for dinner. Spending time with your family will also give you that much deserved break as well as keep them from missing you.

Nurture yourself

When was the last time you wore your favourite clothes, played your favourite sport, clicked photographs, spent time talking to the dog or the goldfish in your aquarium or listened to your favourite music?

Spend some time doing what you enjoy the most. Don't be apprehensive of being judged. Rekindle the child within.

Women today are managing multiple responsibilities and the definition of achievement, success, happiness, joy and quality of relationships is changing.

If you are not flexible enough to mould yourself, then you are headed towards an imbalance. And imbalance should not become a habit.

(The writer is a Partner at W.C.H Training Solutions, a New Delhi-based organisation that offers corporate training interventions in the communication, soft skills, managerial skills and corporate grooming domains.)

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