The Hindu Business Line : <I>Dealing with differences </I>

There are all kinds of people. To manage people one must accept the fact that no two people think and behave in the same manner. I have listed some categories of people and with it tips on how to handle them:

Hostile aggressive: Stand up for yourself; use assertive language; avoid direct confrontation.

Complainers: Listen attentively; acknowledge their feelings; state the facts without being apologetic; use a problem solving mode.

Clams: Ask open-ended questions; be patient for a response, if there is no response, tell them what you plan to do.

Super-agreeables: In a non-threatening manner, find out why they will not take action. Let them know you value them as people. Be ready to compromise and negotiate, and don't allow them to make unrealistic commitments.

Negativists: Do not be dragged into their despair. Discuss the problems thoroughly.

When alternatives are discussed, bring up negatives yourself. Be ready to take action alone, without their agreement.

Know-it-alls/Bulldozers: Prepare yourself; listen and paraphrase their main points.

Indecisive stallers: Find out why the hesitation. Remove the staller from the situation. If you are the problem, ask for help.

Emotional quotient

How can we raise our emotional quotient (EQ)?

The initial requirement to raising your EQ is the desire to change. Step two is learning to reflect. Therein lies the next step in an EQ-boosting regimen — emotional control. "Emotional control is a key skill for conflict management."

Not all emotions should be hidden — that would be a step backward. "But when you can control which emotions you show, then you are that much polished an individual."

Step four is practising empathy. There's no mystery about how to strengthen empathy. "It boils down to practicing active listening skills. It takes concentration to pick up on the emotions that are coming across in a conversation."

For instance, if an employee says, "That person is picking on me," don't just focus on the facts — delve into the underlying emotions. Is he complaining or is he angry? Explore the subtext because there is likely to be one.

The final step in raising EQ is to validate the emotions of the other.

That means acknowledging their emotions, even if they are different from yours. Be sensitive to others, but don't let their emotions rule you.

Softspan (India) Pvt. Ltd, New Delhi

SoftSkillsSpeak@gmail.com

http://MentorQA.blogspot.com

Sarvesh Gulati

More Stories on : Management | Human Resources | Soft Skills

Article E-Mail :: Comment :: Syndication :: Printer Friendly Page