The Hindu Business Line : Build unshakable self-confidence

Have you ever dreamt that you are "late for an appointment, missing trains and buses, unprepared for examinations, not fully dressed when guests arrive, or losing your way"? Perhaps, it is anxiety that is finding its way to dreams, postulates Sri Madhava Ashish in An Open Window (www.penguinbooksindia.com).

The cure for anxiety does not lie in forcing yourself to work harder so as to be better prepared, he advises. Because, by so doing, you may "fall victim to the current glorification of competitiveness and success, which leads only to a self-confidence based on the unstable ground of personal achievement."

On such ground, anxiety is perpetuated, reasons the author. "In a competitive world, there is no assurance that a successful man will not suffer failure at the instance of a more successful man."

Build your self-confidence, instead, on the unshakable certainty of the self, and not on fragile ego-achievements, counsels Ashish. "An adult should be able to rest in the calm certainty of his human essence, neither thinking himself the greater on account of his knowledge, achievements or abilities, nor thinking himself the less on account of his ignorance or failures."

Instructive.

Buffers to beat stress

It may be stressful to know that a widely used but poorly understood word is stress. "When concepts from basic science become popularised, there is potential for oversimplification or alteration of the term that may ultimately belie its origins and add to confusion," writes Wolfgang Linden in Stress Management (www.sagepublications.com).

He defines stress as "a mediational process in which stressors (or demands) trigger an attempt at adaptation or resolution that results in individual distress if the organism is unsuccessful in satisfying the demand."

According to Linden, a promising trend in psychotherapy and stress management is "the attention being paid not only to the reduction of distress but also to the creation of supportive environments and positive mood states that can serve as buffers against the negative effects of strain."

Absence of distress is not equivalent to the simultaneous presence of joy, a sense of meaning, and contentment, he argues.

Another advantage of `buffer' creation the author highlights is that these efforts are "largely controllable by individuals and are readily available, often at no or optima cost, and rarely need professional intervention." However, it may be stressful to know that "there are no readily usable protocols to endow stressed individuals with a meaning of life or a sense of coherence."

A de-stressor.

Tailpiece

"Whenever I'm stressed, I tend to repeat myself."

"Then?"

"Whenever I'm stressed, I tend to repeat myself."

D. MURALI

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