Chotu was ambling along whistling the famous Mohammad Rafi song from the 50s Baap bhala na bhaiya bhaiya sabse bhala rupaiya when he spotted a sullen Motubhai sitting on the pavement.

Kya hua Motu, you’re looking so sad? Did Mumbai Indians lose again?

Arrey Chotu, yeh khel nahin par pet ka sawaal hai...

Oh ho Motabhai, what happened? Didn’t you get your salary?

I did but I cannot lay my hands on the money. It is all safely sitting in my bank account.

Ok, I got you. You don’t have money on you and the ATMs are dry!

Not just me. Lambu, Bittu, Nandu, Gattu and all my other friends are in the same situation. We have money and we don’t have it! That Rafi saheb song that you were whistling... It’s so true.

But don’t you have a Rupay card or Paytm account, Motu? Digital is king now says none other than Modiji himself.

Oh yes, I have more than one card and I have accounts with Paytm, Mobikwik, Phonepe.. See, I even have Bhim app on my mobile but tell me, which sabjiwala, chaiwala or rickshawala accepts cards or Paytm here? Digital maybe king but has no kingdom.

But if Modiji, Arunji and Urjitbhai are to be believed, rickshawalas are pedalling away with POS machines in their hands and sabjiwalas have Paytm labels stuck on their aloos and bhindis.....

Oh, come off it now, Chotu. Don’t add ghee to the raging fire. Since you claim to be more intelligent than me, tell me why this is happening?

I’ll ask a question that even your pea-sized brain can answer. If you were told that your bank is in trouble, what would you do?

Why, simple! I’ll withdraw all the cash from my account...

That’s precisely what your neighbours and others seem to have done...

You mean our banks are in trouble?

Motabhai, depends on how you define trouble. If grappling with borrowers like your friend Nattu who’s refusing to repay his loan is called trouble, yes, our banks are in trouble. But if you define trouble as banks going dival, then you’re wrong...

Got it. Didn’t our Chidambaramji also say something to that effect?

Yes, he said that people have lost trust in banks, which I think is over the top but he thinks he’s the shadow FM and so will speak like that only.

Haan, Chotu, but what’s this I hear about a shortage of the pink Gandhiji notes?

You heard right, Motabhai. The RBI has stopped printing the pink notes because there are too many circulating now.

Arrey, if there are too many, why am I not able to lay my hands on one? Where have they all gone?

Good question, Motu but even Urjitbhai and Modiji don’t seem to know the answer...

Will Chidambaramji know then?

Unlikely... But he might tell you that these notes are being squirrelled away by some people. You know, elections are coming up soon in Karnataka...

Are they giving pink notes to voters there like they gave us all in Chennai last time?

I don’t know Motu but history tells us that rupee circulation usually drops ahead of elections... Also Modiji wants us all to move to a digital economy, so he’s not printing enough notes to keep pace with economic growth...

Arrey baba, that goes over my top. But isn’t there a way to bring those pink notes back from under the mattresses and pillows?

There is Motu. Let’s start a website and publish a fake news that Modiji is planning to withdraw pink notes. And see how they come tumbling out then!

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